Loki/Doom 2012 Why settle for a lesser evil?

You could settle for petty tyrants who steal a vote here and there or block uncontroversial legislation out of mere partisan spite, but why not think big? Pretensions of altruism and benevolence are for the weak and dishonest, promising virtues never achieved. This year, vote for an honest villain – a supervillain!

Admit the truth that lies deep in your heart, you crave subjugation. Kneel to your rightful overlord and achieve more than you ever dreamed possible. America deserves to be great again, why settle for invading mere countries when all the nine realms might tremble at your feet? Be reminded what real power is: vote Loki/Doom 2012.


  1. You know… Doom is pretty stupid for being such a genius.

    He’s got Latveria. Set that up as a utopia, albeit one with an absolute monarch. (Not that unusual for Europe.) Ratify as many treaties as possible, with as many nations.

    Then you do what China does… you set up state-run corporations which purchase the mineral rights from other underdeveloped countries. You commercialize your tech, selling your products in capitalist economies. What industries you do not dominate as a pioneer (cold fusion, spaceflight, temporal dynamics), you acquire via the stock market. Governments refuse your acquisition? Then enter the market and drive your rival into liquidation. Of course, your factories are in the second- and third-world, where costs are cheaper, and governments are more eager to compromise (and where there is less regulation). Perhaps your factory can be declared a diplomatic mission, exempt from local law.

    If a country nationalizes your holdings, then your security force (your military) secures your property until it is dismantled and shipped elsewhere (the next country over, possibly with economic incentives). Perhaps you encourage your (highly trained) native workforce to immigrate as well, creating a brain drain on the country. Oh, and you cease all diplomatic and economic relations with the country, and possibly pursue legal remedies via the World Trade Organization.

    Oh, and you set up a banking system. Why should Luxembourg and Switzerland have all the fun?

    Meanwhile, the homeland/home office is relatively unspoiled, making it a tourist destination. (As well as a destination for duty free shopping!)

    Set up a university and educational system to encourage all citizens to achieve their greatest potential. Once this is perfected, you set up for-profit universities around the world, training your future workers. Tuition is on credit, but you can write that off if you work for a Latverian corporation for five years, while getting paid. (Guaranteed job at graduation, with a Fortune Five [sic] company!) After that, you’re free to work at wherever, but why, when Victorious companies are so competitive?

    Oh, and colonize the Moon. Since none of the other space-faring countries have ratified the Moon Treaty, Latveria can exploit those resources (while magnanimously leaving the surface relatively pristine).

    Perhaps Victorious builds a Dyson bubble around the Earth.

    If aliens show up, then you use that as an excuse to amend space treaties regarding weapons in space.

    And that’s how you rule the world.
    (See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Democratic_peace_theory#.22Golden_Arches_Theory_of_Conflict_Prevention.22 )

  2. The funny thing about the idea of a superhero being elected president is that a power does nothing to solve social problems. No superhero anyone could name could do any better at solving the Israeli-Palestinian conflict via fiat than any president has. The Tea Party-rest of the country split would be just as unsolvable.

    Superheroes can tackle acute crises, but that’s all about all they can do.


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