If you’re are like me, you are watching the Olympics, which is shorthand for bouts of gymnastics interrupted by endless play by play, minutely detailed, microscopic examination of women’s beach volleyball.
Seriously, how is this even a sport? I mean, we all know the answer to that, but why is it a sport that has every single game covered?
Or uncovered as the case may be.
Seriously, I would like to have been at the meeting where they fashioned the regulation decreeing that women in this “sport” must wear bikinis. It’s especially puzzling when men wear baggy shorts and tank tops.
No one is getting fooled here.
Some emotion came with today’s Russia/Georgia game, even if the Georgian players were ringers from Brazil. As you can see from the above, they also have a little jiggle in the caboose, which would totally disqualify them from any other team on earth.
If people are going to be so fascinated by women’s sports, I would like to propose that we find new sweethearts, namely, the softball competitors. (There is no men’s softball in the Olympics.)
The US women have been undefeated for something like 10 years. In fact, softball and baseball are both getting yanked from the Olympics after these games and part of the reason is that the US women’s softball team is just too damned good. If you like the volleyball beach bunnies, how can you not love the softball terminators? They are so wrapped up in pads and braces and bandages that they seem to be more machine than woman.
Ladies and gentlemen, let’s give these hard working athletes the acclaim and attention they deserve! And let’s keep softball in the Olympics! If it’s cheesecake they’re after, this is where it’s at.
Oh, PS: Australia’s softball team has a player named Natalie Titcume. I think that speaks for itself.