NopenisparkerSeveral blogs commented yesterday on a retailer panic over SPIDER-MAN REIGN: #1 by Kaare Andrews, which contained a panel of a sad, old Peter Parker thinking about saltines with a sad, shriveled pecker clearly visible. (Marvel claimed it was a shadow — of its former self, yes.) We’ve reproduced the panel here with a modesty patch, but you can click on it for the FULL FILTHY ORIGINAL.

While such a small matter would seem to be of little interest, retailers were alarmed–as the Gordon Lee case shows, there is nothing more offensive to American values than the sight of a pee-pee. One admires Andrews dedication to the truth, but perhaps a Spider-Man comic was not the place to exercise it. Marvel explained that the wrong files were sent out, has made the issue returnable, and a variant no-penis edition will be shipped out.

Spiderman-2002-02-17-1836-48For a real idea of The Truth Is Out There, you can go here. We’re supplied a bowlderizer version of what to expect for the faint of heart. Link NOT SAFE FOR WORK. Repeat, NOT SAFE FOR WORK. Or sanity.


  1. well…it always amazes me oh north-american masses are offended by brief nudity. After reading the issue, the penis was really the less insulting thing really. Andrews, an artist that I have previously quite admired, resorts to make a weak imitation of Miller’s dark knight, both in art and writing. THAT we should get up in arms about.

  2. Seeing as this REIGN jazz seems to be a watered-down version of DARK KNIGHT RETURNS (I say this without having seen more than the preview, so perhaps that’s unfair), and that book itself had its share of bare tits and non-descript genitalia, this should really not have come as a surprise to anyone who’d be likely to buy this book. But yeah, poor choice, since DARK KNIGHT came out before Batman was revived as a major property, whereas Spidey is presently ascendant. I just hope Marvel doesn’t choose to take its misstep out on poor Kaare.

  3. You dirty bastard! You don’t put a fucking naked man in a comic it’s so fucking nasty! God damn who taught you how to make a comic! Nasty motherfucker.

Comments are closed.