As if the glum economic news wasn’t enough, they are now destroying our chocolate: Melamine-tainted milk from China has forced the withdrawal of several of Cadbury’s English confections:

Cadbury, the British confectionery giant, is the latest victim of a tainted milk scandal that has left at least four babies dead in China and the company has withdrawn 11 chocolate products made in Beijing.

The company said that tests on items from Cadbury Eclairs and bulk packets of Dairy Milk had raised concerns and the sweets sold in mainland China, Taiwan, Hong Kong and Australia had been recalled as a precautionary step.

Look, dying infants means this is NO JOKE, it’s as serious as hell, so we’re really not trying to make light of this. The melamine (basically ground up plastic shit) was added to the dairy product to give it added body and up its protein content. Last year, melamine contamination in pet food is suspected to have caused the deaths of many animal companions and caused a giant pet food recall.

If you’ve ever tasted the English version of Cadbury’s, you know it is far, far superior to the domestic version. It’s one of those things that makes life bearable. The idea that our choccies are now contaminated is a gloomy one.

Our suggestion? Keep a cow in the back yard, or on the roof or whatever. These days, it couldn’t hurt.


  1. Melamine really isn’t going to impact an healthy adult at the quantities that are in the chocolates unless you go on a binge and then you probably have a better chance of death by overconsumption of chocolate than something like kidney failure. It’s the elderly and infants that might have to be more careful, but then I wouldn’t be feeding them chocolate in the first place.

  2. I now use this exhibit to show those who’ve always proclaimed that there is nothing wrong with China as per it’s economic value.

    Fact is, it’s a bad country and it’s cheap products should not be considered safe.