Home Culture End of the World The sleep of reason breeds CHIHUAHUAS

The sleep of reason breeds CHIHUAHUAS

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We’ve returned from northern climes just in time to see that all we’ve worked for is lying in smoking ruins, as BEVERLY HILLS CHIHUAHUA was the box office champ for the second straight week.

Do you see? Do you see now what your lax standards and anti-elitism have done? Do you see how the triumph of family fare has led to this? Hopes fail. An end comes. We are lost in ruin and downfall, and there is no escape.

  1. I’m not quite sure why you have to bash family fare. I do see the movie as deplorably bad, but to say that family fare is the root of all evil is just a tad too elitist for me. Yes, I know you say it with humor in mind, but I still find your comments appeal to the lowest common denominator in terms of humor.

    Why can’t folks appreicate a wide variety of material and not denigrate one spectrum of the creative realm when its a calculated movie that is so demographically dimwitted they have fault with?

    Brian

  2. Let’s fast forward some months and try this argument when Watchmen comes out, gets 10 stars, makes a qillion dollars in worldwide DVD sales, and sells through at Target for 12.99 riding atop red shopping carts filled with socks, Frosted Flakes, and Tylenol. That will make it American family fare, won’t it?

    But I’m more interested in the next question: when all that happens, will Watchmen still be -cool-?

    It will still be good, but will it be -cool-? And how much is one indebted to the other?

    Brad

  3. I think people want light, fun fare in the midst of all this economic despair that the media has been pounding about our ears lately. Personally, I would expect to see more movies like this over the next few years. And that isn’t a bad thing. Many people need that escape, and if that involves watching cute puppies running around on screen for two hours, more power to ’em. I think it looks cute and has something of the visual and storytelling style of Legally Blonde, which is actually, weirdly, one of my favorite movies. :D

  4. Light, fun fare is not inherently bad–my problem with Beverly Hills Chihuahua out of the gate (not having seen it, of course) is that I didn’t think it was physically possible or even at this point legal to return once again to the hellishly overdone pot of “Beverly Hills _____” for story premises. It’s like those manatees that write “Family Guy” moved to the big screen and regressed 15 years. (See: South Park for manatee theory).

  5. Even Body of Lies fudged at the box office.

    I guess no one wants a ripped from the headlines global economic Ludlum inspired cold war spy story to snack to their nachos with in these cash strapped tumultous times.

    Just wishy washy escapism will do.

    ~

    Coat

  6. Beverly Hills… cop (I – IV), ninja, chihuahua, bordello, family robinson, vamp, brats, madam, body snatchers, cowgirl blues, call girls, massacre, on ice, christmas, standoff, SUV, vet…

    No zombies (yet), superheroes, Beverly Hills Nebraska (a reversal on 90210, although Green Acres kinda did it), day care, state fair, disco…

    Torsten’s Contradiction: “If it’s crap and it sells, then it isn’t crap.”

    Two things you might not have noticed:
    1) It’s a talking dog movie. Even when Charlton Heston is voicing the dog, it’s gonna stink a little.
    2) Might we soon see a Lancelot Link movie? Imagine all the bratty kids screaming for pet chimpanzees! And then the chimpanzees revolt! (Hey! Another movie idea! Call my agent!)

    Meanwhile, Dark Knight pulled in another $500,000 this weekend.

  7. In a nation that has been in a nearly six year long war that was predicated on lies,…that has cost thousands of lives,…where an uncaring moron like George W. Bush is the president for two terms and people can take the likes of Sarah Palin seriously as a vice presidential candidate, it makes total sense that a movie about a talking chihuaha is number one at the box office.

  8. “where is the MR ED movie?”

    Surely, you’re not forgetting the 1988 Bobcat Goldthwait masterpiece HOT TO TROT, are you?

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