We have a little confession to make. We’re a bit abashed to say it aloud, but it had to be said because holding it in any longer just wasn’t an option. You see, we know we have been dogging it here at Stately Beat Manor lately. Our new morning schedule, while healthful and invigorating, means we make more mistakes than ever because we’re just not morning people here. Our hours of peak efficiency are 11 pm until about 2 am, when we reach a crescendo of wit, dash and spunk that leaves all who witness it changed forever.
With the new “dayworld” schedule, however, we are just turning in at 11 pm, extinguishing the lamps, putting out the dogs, and settling into our sleeping cap. Our peak is lost to sleep and dreaming. And who suffers for this?
We know we haven’t been living up to your expectations. And that is not acceptable. Not here, or for the Commander Guy. So we’re making a new pledge. You deserve the best, and we’re giving you the best. At first we were going to turn it up to 11, but we realized that you — the faithful Beat readers who have carried us right to the top with your comments, hints and linkage — for folk such as you, 11 is not even enough.
So we’re sparing nothing. We’re turning it up to *12*. Buckle your seatbelts! We’re not holding back! You’re going to look like that guy in the old Maxell ads by the time we’re through with you, because it’s going to be coming at you fast and furious like nothing you’ve ever seen before! We’ll spare no expense, unstone no tern, leave no chettel unwhipped. Round and round and round she goes, and where she stops…nobody knows! Really! Nobody knows! Yep, we said it. NOBODY KNOWS.
It’s the new 11.