A few people sent this to me last night, but out of respect for Tony Harris’s great art, I couldn’t bring myself to post it, but now that he’s asked people to retweet it, here you go:
I cant remember if Ive said this before, but Im gonna say it anyway. I dont give a crap.I appreciate a pretty Gal as much as the next Hetero Male. Sometimes I even go in for some racy type stuff ( keeping the comments PG for my Ladies sake) but dammit, dammit, dammit I am so sick and tired of the whole COSPLAY-Chiks. I know a few who are actually pretty cool-and BIG Shocker, love and read Comics.So as in all things, they are the exception to the rule. Heres the statement I wanna make, based on THE RULE: “Hey! Quasi-Pretty-NOT-Hot-Girl, you are more pathetic than the REAL Nerds, who YOU secretly think are REALLY PATHETIC. But we are onto you. Some of us are aware that you are ever so average on an everyday basis. But you have a couple of things going your way. You are willing to become almost completely Naked in public, and yer either skinny( Well, some or most of you, THINK you are ) or you have Big Boobies. Notice I didnt say GREAT Boobies? You are what I refer to as “CON-HOT”. Well not by my estimation, but according to a LOT of average Comic Book Fans who either RARELY speak to, or NEVER speak to girls. Some Virgins, ALL unconfident when it comes to girls, and the ONE thing they all have in common? The are being preyed on by YOU. You have this really awful need for attention, for people to tell you your pretty, or Hot, and the thought of guys pleasuring themselves to the memory of you hanging on them with your glossy open lips, promising them the Moon and the Stars of pleasure, just makes your head vibrate. After many years of watching this shit go down every 3 seconds around or in front of my booth or table at ANY given Con in the country, I put this together. Well not just me. We are LEGION. And here it is, THE REASON WHY ALL THAT, sickens us: BECAUSE YOU DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT COMICS, BEYOND WHATEVER GOOGLE IMAGE SEARCH YOU DID TO GET REF ON THE MOST MAINSTREAM CHARACTER WITH THE MOST REVEALING COSTUME EVER. And also, if ANY of these guys that you hang on tried to talk to you out of that Con? You wouldnt give them the fucking time of day. Shut up you damned liar, no you would not. Lying, Liar Face. Yer not Comics. Your just the thing that all the Comic Book, AND mainstream press flock to at Cons. And the real reason for the Con, and the damned costumes yer parading around in? That would be Comic Book Artists, and Comic Book Writers who make all that shit up.
What was it I wrote just yesterday?
To every one who is horribly abused and bothered by this, let me ask you — what has caused more of the emotional scarring? Is is the fact that a girl who is sexually unavailable to you and therefore causing sexual frustration is pretending to be a nerd while doing so…or is it that a girl is sexually unavailable to you and therefore causing sexual frustration?
And now the cat’s out of the bag. Horrible non-fan women tempting innocent comics-reading virgins with their Pixie costumes.
Now, there is a germ of truth to this based on the fact that hot women have been used to sell every product known to mankind since mankind ever existed. And there have been many complaints over the years from female professionals over “booth babes” who were obviously paid models who came to the shows to attract lonely nerds. Call it the G4 effect.
…and I personally don’t like the Slave Leia legion because anyone who would rather dress as a slave than a rebel commander definitely is doing it for attention….
…but to brand all the women who like dressing as comic characters in this way really shows more issues with women than anything to do with cons or costuming. Jill Pantozzi, a dedicated cosplayer and writer about comics, was the first out of the gate with scorn.
Wow, I’m never buying anything Tony Harris does again. Disgusting.
…and I’m sure the other first responders are on their way now.
Just setting aside the hostility towards women which Harris’s post displays, there’s the damn “nerd entry card” again. WTF? What is with this cry for authenticity and nerd knowledge! The truth is at comic-cons I’ve seen plenty of men flapping around with their franks and beans hanging out of their tights. Does anyone question whether they are nerds or comics readers or have a pull list or are just trying to get their rocks off by showing their rocks off?
Someday, I believe there will be a day when fanboys accept that women like and read superhero comic books. Or just to quote Gail Simone one more time:
…being at a convention, a busy convention, and having dozens, sometimes hundreds of women in my signing line, not there because they are being dragged there but because they love comics—taking pictures with them, admiring their amazing cosplay, listening to their ideas and hopes and favorite stories, listening to their passion about the characters and the medium in general, talking with endless female aspiring writers and so many ridiculously talented female colleagues… …and then having to go to an interview or a panel and being asked why don’t women read comics.
That day has not come. Sadly, based on the number of Harris’s Facebook friends who were all “Damn straight, buddy!” he was just saying what a lot of people are thinking. As Pantozzi put it:
Fucking hell, and people wonder why women feel the need to fight so damn hard.
Heidi MacDonald is the founder and editor in chief of The Beat. In the past, she worked for Disney, DC Comics, Fox and Publishers Weekly. She can be heard regularly on the More To Come Podcast. She likes coffee, cats and noble struggle.