Immigration Official TELLS IT LIKE IT IS to Tony Lee:
There was one concern while I was in customs – when asked why I was there, I explained that I was going to the San Diego Comic Con, no, I mean superheroes, not comedians – and the customs officer goes ‘You know about solvent abuse?’
Now, what the hell am I supposed to say here? Did I look like some kind of deviant comic professional? Should I reply with ‘I’m from London, mate – we invented glue sniffing’?
I make a vague agreeing motion, wondeing what the hell I’ve brought into the country in my luggage – am I about to be deported back? But no. The customs guard wants to inform me that one of the current ‘trends’ in California is that when people who have severe solvent abuse addiction well, die – their possessions are put up for public auction, and many of them have boxes of comic books, usually sold off at a dollar a box. I tried to sound vaguely interested in this (as opposed to horrified) and escaped into the terminal where I had a burger. Of course, it’s now
Glue sniffers love them comics. Or do comic fans love their glue?
While I do appreciate the sweet cherry smell of old leather bindings, and there’s something about decaying pulp in a used bookstore, I DO NOT huff, sniff, snort, inhale, or in any way recieve excessive and/or addictive aromatic enjoyment from my comics. (I do like to take old 70s Marvels and rub them all over my body until I look like a giant piece of Silly Putty, but everyone does that. Right? I’m not like those sickos who leave the staples in. ugh.)
Old 70’s Marvels do make a great papier maché body scrub. It’s the secret to my soft baby buns.