No need to write any more, in advance of this weekend’s Bristol Comic Expo, Budgie has done it all:

Checking in was [easy/a pain/interminable] and I nodded at [name dropped in the hope that it'll make me seem more important]. He nodded back, [pleased to see me/sympathising/wondering who the hell I was]. We promise to [catch up later/ignore each other/pick on the French]. So that was [nice/cool/unpleasant].

I got to the room and [had a shower/lit up a the first of many cigarettes/changed rooms immediately].

I [grabbed some sleep/went for a swim/started drinking] and all too soon, it was dinner time. I’d decided to eat [at the hotel/out/to get some food inside me before the heavy drinking] and I returned to the bar to find [a pro you've never heard of, so don't sweat it, but maybe if I mention him, I'll get a sketch off of him next year].